Always Keep Fighting

I realized it’s been 8 months since I reapplied for Social Security Disability Insurance for the second time. I did it myself the first time and was denied. I reapplied with new information and was denied once again. I hired a lawyer and have been waiting for 8 months now. In Virginia, there is a 12-18 mos wait for an Appeal Hearing in front of a judge. 8 months! 8 months with no source of income because until SSDI is approved, I am not eligible for any state or government assistance (Medicaid, etc.) If approved, I am then eligible for both benefits. But what about now?! For the past almost 4 years I’ve been fighting this ridiculous system! I’m sure it’s jammed with false claims and scammers, but it’s affecting me, and that hurts! I worked for almost 30 years full-time until I had to stop for medical reasons. I was always a loyal employee and loved my jobs. They were not only a means of financial support, but a reason to get up in the morning, to interact with other people, to learn new things, and to be a part of something larger than myself. I would give anything to be able to work again! If nothing else, to get out of this house and ease my rut of depression and anxiety. Having a purpose so I don’t feel so useless and worthless. But my body won’t allow it. I try to get ready to go out and am inundated with symptoms too many to list. Occasionally, my demons let me out for a few pain-free hours of doctor appointments or picking up prescriptions, but rarely to have lunch with one of the few friends that haven’t left me, or to a museum to enjoy the art without perfume, noise, and lights driving me back into the safety of my home. I know that winning my case and getting my benefits isn’t a cure-all, but the relief from my financial burden will ease my depression, anxiety, and panic attacks immensely! Then I can concentrate solely on finding relief and proper treatment for the RA, Fibro, and chronic daily migraines. Fingers crossed. Breath held. Better days ahead.

One thought on “Always Keep Fighting

  1. While I don’t doubt there are false claims and scammers out there, I don’t really think that’s the reason they are so slow to approve. I think it’s just an excuse in hopes of getting as many people as possible to give up and stop asking. That and there are more and more people every day in need of disability due to the ever increasing number of chronic illnesses that are developing. Sending you some hope and luck that your application will be accepted soon relieving a huge burden of stress for you.

    Liked by 1 person

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