What Not to Say to Someone With Migraine (cont’d)

newlifeoutlook | Migraine
What Not to Say to Someone With Migrainewpid-wp-1421975721526.jpeg
“Seriously, how can you have another migraine? Again?”

Well, they don’t seem to set a schedule for me to know when they will strike, so I don’t know why I have another one, but I assure you they will keep coming unless someone finds an actual lasting cure.

“You don’t look sick.”

That is because I push on through most of the time and continue with as much of my life as I can. If this struck you several days per month, wouldn’t you try and keep living your life too? It doesn’t mean I am not in agony — it means I am trying to keep going.

“You just need to get out more.”

With migraines you tend to retreat when you are under attack. But I do actually go out and do things, the same things people who don’t suffer from migraines do.

“You need to get more exercise.”

is part of several things you can do to help control the number of attacks you may get, but it does not prevent or stop a migraine. I actually do exercise on my good days and, big surprise, it does not stop me from getting migraines.

“I think you thrive on sympathy.”

While I think everyone appreciates having someone sympathize when they are in excruciating pain, I am not “claiming” to have a migraine to get your sympathy. In fact, anyone who would suggest that as a reason probably lacks the required compassion required to provide sympathy to me. Sympathy can be nice, but what I seek is understanding and compassion.

“I wouldn’t take all those pain medications. Natural remedies are the only way to go.”

Well, I don’t love taking them either, but in the midst of a migraine I will honestly take whatever might possibly work. Natural remedies may help, but they do not alleviate the pain enough to rule out other medications that might. When you feel like your head is about to break open for three days straight, you are willing to take or do just about anything for relief.
I have found this miracle shake (or supplement) — you should try it!”

And you sell it, only you really just want to recruit me to your downline and make me auto purchase the stuff for hundreds of dollars per month. I have heard it from a number of people who say they are not “salespeople” and are only trying to share information and help people.

No, you are trying to build a downline and are preying upon desperate people to do so. Honestly, if there was a cure for major diseases the word would spread and doctors would get on board (yes, there are still some who care more about their patients and a cure than anything else). While supplements and such may help, just like natural remedies, I do not believe you have found a cure that is only available to me if I join your “team”.

I think people say some of these things to migraine sufferers because they simply do not think about what they imply or how their words can hurt or cause insult. The more awareness there is about the chronic condition, the more compassion and kindness can be offered in place of these disturbing remarks and suggestions.

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Barbara Leech
Dec 1, 2015

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