So. Here I am again. Sitting in the living room at o’dark thirty. It’s so quiet. Peaceful. I’ve got my furbaby Samantha sleeping on the couch next to me. One paw touching my leg. She’s snoring softly. So relaxed. I’m jealous. YES, jealous. Of a CAT! I know, right?! I must be crazy. But the thought of being that relaxed, at ease, mindless, just doing what comes naturally. I want that. I need that! I can’t remember the last time I slept soundly. Solidly. Without nightmares. Without dreams. Just deep, restorative sleep. Letting my mind and body rest. Recover. Heal. Strengthen. Prepare for tomorrow. So yeah, I’m jealous. I envy Sam her oblivion. Her body telling her what to do without thought. Without care. Without will. Without anything. Just being. I want that for myself. I want to turn off my brain and just be. Breathe without consciousness. No worries. No stress. No pain. Please.